Random musings of a wandering soul

He must have been about eight or nine when I first met him. The hand that offered me a bunch of grapes belonged to a cute face and a lanky frame. We shared a room quite a few times in the next couple of years. His parents, both of them close of friends of mine, moved to a different city, but we still kept in touch regularly. The contacts turned few and far in between the normal twists and turns that life takes. At the so called crucial juncture in a young one’s life, he was very clear which way he wanted to go. The existential angst happened after graduation. To follow the trodden path , making a living and loving something else, enslaved in a false sense of security or follow his heart and be secure in the knowledge that he did what had to. That was about less than half an year ago. A couple of weeks back, he was a part of one of the boutique cafes in the charming by-lanes of Kochi , capturing the hearts and palettes of many a guest with the dishes that he churned out,the notes that wafted from his guitar and a voice that sang out to their souls. Today, he is the lead singer of a well known music band travelling across India.

He got it right as his FB status rightly said on the day of his first major performance, “Send out a thought to the universe and your dream comes true.” Yes, dreams do come true, when you chase them relentlessly and never give up.

His father and I have had multiple conversations on kids, education, life and of course, dreams. We were brought up to believe that financial security was of utmost importance. Probably because that is what our parents strived to have. And maybe that is why we go all out and say we want our children to do what they want. But, sometimes I wonder, do we actually believe in it completely? If we do not, what is it that is pulling us back?

In the past three years, son has not wavered from what he wants to be – a professional footballer. As he is growing up, we as parents have starting thinking what if that doesn’t work out, shouldn’t he have a plan B? We see kids who are better than him, and wonder whether he has in it to actually make it. If not, what then? Yes, I know, it is too early, he is just about twelve, and he is doing pretty well in his studies. Are we unconsciously transferring these little insecurities to him?

Maybe, I need not worry. His dreams, like that of my friend’s son, remain focused. In his mind, he is the best. When people say today’s kids lack focus, I feel like laughing out loud. They are the ones who are much more focused than we ever were. They know exactly what they want and how to get it. The disconnect is in whose focus it is. Our generation has residues of our parents in us. And our kids seem to have already shaken us off or is in the process already. Their definition of happiness is totally different from ours. Yes, they are scared of failure, but unlike many of us, they are not scared to give it a chance. And, in the process, teach us a thing or two.

Like son asked me the other day,

“Amma, what was your dream?”

“To be a writer”

“You Β still can be”

Yes, the little one is indeed growing up.

One of my favorite songs say it all…..


Comments on: "Wishing them dreams…." (24)

  1. Life has changed so much since we were young, Bindu. I remember when I finished school, it was all about getting educated to a get a ‘secure’ job. Children now are so much more confident and have so many more options. Like you said, parents are more financially secure and that helps. I’m sure son will find his way in life and excel at what he does. As for his Mom, he’s right, it’s never too late to follow that dream, is it? πŸ™‚

  2. Every generation leaves its residues on the next one. I would like to believe that today’s generation has moved beyond the doctor-engineer syndrome. I know I am wrong but there is a small percentage that has broken the mold. It is a difficult decision for parents. What if the child fails? What if he/she loses interest and it is too late to walk another path?

    • I think our parents were pretty cool, all said and done. Their motto was very simple, “good for you if you do something with yourself in life, else, you will have to face the consequences”.
      Maybe, today’s parents tend to be too protective, the angst is endless…

  3. Wow, Bindu…this post fills my heart with such warmth and hope. Its beautiful that kids can sometimes how us the way with such ease while we are still unsure if it would lead us through. Good luck, Bindu! I loved this ‘hopeful’ post, completely!

  4. True that many kids of these days teach us new things and also courage. Good luck for his endeavors and urs too.. Feels good to catch up on the blog πŸ™‚

  5. “Follow your heart, your dreams” is the mantra of the new generation and rightly so. As parents we have our concerns but when their focus is clear, giving wings to their dreams should be our mantra! Good luck to the sonny boy! πŸ™‚

  6. Hi Bindu! Children often know best because their mind is not cluttered with all the stuff adults’ minds are. πŸ™‚ You ARE a writer. Blessings to your son! I loved this post.

  7. Beautiful post, Bindu! Loved it. It gives me hope. πŸ™‚

  8. Nice post. You are right, let the kids follow their dreams and they won’t let you down. And age is no barrier to follow one’s dreams. So what are you waiting for? Write on…

  9. I agree that the situation seems to be a bit better than before. The engineer-doctor syndrome was a bit disheartening. There is nothing wrong with being one if that is what the child really wants. But I know scores of parents who do not see beyond these two as a career for their kids. It’s sad really.

    The world is brimming with opportunities. Wish kids would look beyond the obvious…

    • Ashwathy, more often than not, kids do look beyond the obvious, it is the parents who cannot see beyond what they want to. One of my friends was mentioning about a friend of theirs who said he wanted his gifted son to play piano in a jazz bar, but the mother wouldn’t even hear of it. Needless to say, the kid is doing some doc/engg course now. What a waste !

  10. meenamenon said:

    N the courage to dream n give it a chance maybe courtesy you?

  11. Yup, one life to live. Gotta follow that yearn within!

    Well said πŸ™‚

  12. Naina had a creative writing contest where she had to write abt what she wanted to become in life[or something like tht]. She wrote abt how she wanted to be a fashion designer in the morning, president of the country afternoon and a fashionista who modelled her own clothes in the evening/night. I held my head in amusement when I heard abt it and hoped the teacher wd be kind. And what do u knw she won the 1st prize for the contest;-o. she had written in detail about how she was going to make it happen and on paper it made complete sense πŸ˜›
    What I mean to say is tht most often we make the mistake of thinking tht we know the best for our children and they have to follow the guidelines we lay out to be successful. Oh how wrong the whole thinking is.

    p.s: You ARE a writer Bindu :-)).

    • Wow! What a beautiful dream, Nancy and when you think of it, perfectly doable too. I love that teacher of hers. Kids do not put a limit to their imagination , isn’t it? Wonder when we start losing it? Sigh!!!

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