Errr…that was just an excuse for being lazy, hope to be unlazy enough to write a little more often 🙂 Thanks again, Nancy for never giving up 🙂
Meeting friends and family after a long time was exciting and tiring too. One thing I realize is my patience is growing thinner and my tolerance levels are reducing at a very fast pace. Is that a sign of growing mature or old, I wonder!
Some of the new age parents that I happened to meet over the last two months makes me wonder what kind of a parent I am. We come from a generation where parents specially fathers were at a respectable distance, sometimes the wondrous benefactor, at times the frightful ogre who waits to pounce on us when we digress from the path that they set for us.Those days, the moment guests came on scene the lesser folks like us were banished to the netherlands, not to be heard or even seen. And woe behold anyone dumb enough to act smart to them in front of others.
Maybe I belong to another generation and an old school. In spite of being friends with the kids and giving them their space, we make it very clear where the line is – for everything. Crying and throwing tantrums doesn’t work, period. The drama might be acted out in public and I might be the demonic mother who doesn’t buy a chocolate for her kid, but that’s ok with me as long as my kids know what is allowed or expected and not. I still remember the day when I tried shouting back with loads of attitude at my mother. She didn’t utter a word till I finished my tirade. Then the lady turns around grandly and tells me, “I will talk to you again when you learn to treat me with respect”. It must be more than twenty five years now, but the day and her face is still as clear to me as a few minutes ago.
There is this little boy who is sitting crying from the morning. And guess why? The only thing he’ll have for breakfast is fried chicken! And his mother has sent her father off to buy chicken so that the boy will have ‘something to fill his stomach’. Then there is the couple who came visiting to my friend’s brand new apartment that she lovingly decorated over the course of more than a year. She was brave enough to have sofas covered in pristine white since her kids were relatively grown up and had the sense to know where they stand. The couple sauntered in with their three year old in tow who went straight to the refirgerator and plumped her hand into a gooey black forrest cake. Then she comes rushing back to her mother who is sitting demurely on the sofa…you can guess the rest! My friend’s daughter asks her, “Amma, if we had done something like this in some other house, you would have whacked us then and there. Why do you keep quiet?”
The next one started jumping up and down on our sofa screaming at the top of his lungs, threatening to kill his father – at 12 in the midnight!
I am far from being the perfect mother and my kids are further away from being a saint or an angel. They keep getting into and sometimes creates situations – some accidental, some deliberate and certain others I don’t even what to think about. My question is, aren’t we as parents at least supposed to tell them what is right and not? And when words doesn’t seem to work, give them a kick in the right direction?